Creating Space advice & strategies breath checking in creating space emotions & emotional inventory mindset matters monkey mind pause recalibration self-care

For something new, I attended a meditation meeting with theme of “creating space”.   My mind immediately raced ahead, trying to anticipate what wisdom the speaker would reveal.  (This is why I really need meditation in my life — to quiet my monkey mind).

Would this space be a protective bubble from all that is negative?

Would this be the space be a room or place of one’s own for quiet reflection?

Would the space be related to emotional space?

Were there ways I could create space or a presence in someone else’s life?




It is as simple as this.  The speaker described “space” as a moment when it is just you   connecting to your breath.  Space is a moment when you settle down into your core and “check in”.

We Americans are addicted to activity.    We look at sitting still and doing nothing as lazy, weird and uncomfortable.  We even multitask rather than focus on one particular activity at a time.  We watch mind numbing television to zone out.  I can relate to how difficult it is to do nothing but is “creating space” really doing nothing?  NO, it is a conscious act of surrender.  A very important SOMETHING!

Here is how I plan to sneak in more space in my day. 

I will get up a little earlier each morning to enjoy my coffee to the sound of the birds rather than the morning news. 

I will not overschedule myself with activities. 

I will have an electronics free evening once a week. 

I will breathe deeply when I stand in line, am placed on hold or wait for a document to load.

Space can be enjoyed in seconds and minutes, hours and days.

May the space I create for myself, help provide ample light to illuminate the beauty of my being.

Today someone asked me how I had changed since my younger years.  My answer was that I have not changed but rather I have fully settled into who I am; letting my authentic self be revealed.

Find space, dear friends, and thrive!

From the heart,


Artwork found at Simply Sitting Blog titled “Taming the Monkey Mind”

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Living in Alignment (plus a free PSA for NON-frequent flyers) advice & strategies choices emotions emotions & emotional inventory pause relationships & communication

For the last two weeks, the word ALIGNMENT has been on my mind.  Perhaps this is a good thing since I am on a ten day business trip—the “Cara –Palooza”—jaunting across the country, meeting folks for my day job.  I love meeting the clients in person but I have to say, sitting in airports and wearing the same two outfits over and over is making me cranky! 

In simple terms, alignment can be defined as the proper placement of muscles so that your bones have to do less work and therefore expend less energy.  (I always feel better after yoga!)  Another example is how we balance the tires on our car so that they wear evenly.  This makes sense in the physical realm, however, what does alignment mean in the non-physical realm?

Emotionally I feel neutral; like my tires are balanced or my weight is evenly distributed between my two feet.  It took a concerted effort to land in this ZEN DEN.  At first I would describe the feeling as hollow or floating.   I didn’t know what to do without a whirlwind of turmoil in my head or anger in my gut.  Slowly the practice of gratitude and living in the present shifted me into neutral.  My mind is not fighting my emotions.  I prefer to think I contemplate my emotions.

Last week my favorite Uncle passed away after a long battle with emphysema.  He was plain tired of fighting and after a bought of pneumonia, he remained physically weak.  We joked that he liked control down to the very last detail but I am sure that he felt both a spiritual and emotional alignment when he decided it was time to let go.  Uncle Dave always made me feel good about myself and for that, I am blessed. 

Alignment is not intuitive because evolutionarily, we are born to react.  Being on the defensive or as I like to call it, being prepared (wink, wink), means I am threatened by you or I pose a threat to you.  If you take time to smell the daisies, practice kindness or god forbid meditate, prepare to be mowed over!

Alignment is an active practice. It is a choice with a lovely pay-off.

As the “Cara Palooza” comes to a close, I feel the need to offer a Public Service Announcement for those of you who don’t travel often; to help you get into alignment of course! (and out of my alignment)

  1. The gate attendant will not forget to board the plane when it is time.  You don’t have to remind them to do their job.
  2. Please exit the plane as you would exit a church service or wedding— ONE ROW AT A TIME. 
  3. Do not block the aisle, hallway, sidewalk, etc. with your stuff.   STEP TO THE SIDE.
  4. You loud talkers — STOP!  Just because you have time to talk doesn’t mean you should.
  5. Use headphones— I am trying to read “Fifty Shades of Grey” in the row behind you and I don’t want to listen to that crap you have blaring at full...
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Be Careful What You Wish For! advice & strategies confidence friendship kindness mindset matters pause relationships & communication

What a night!  Attending a dinner party on a school night seemed like such an illicit affair! Delicious food and even more delicious company!  We sat at the dining room table and used the good china! I wouldn’t have cared if we had been served frozen waffles on paper plates.  I am grateful for the opportunity to relax and enjoy each other’s company.

There was a spiritual kinship amongst the guests; five women who have reinvented themselves at least once if not twice in their lives.  Women who shine because they possess the fine quality of being authentic; comfortable in the skin they embody.

At 7pm, a gong sound rang out and our “Hostess with the Mostess” let us in on a wonderful new practice.  At the same time every day, the gong sound reminds her to stop and say a blessing for her friends.  WOW—uber cool!

She learned of this practice while visiting a college friend and wanted to pass it along to us.  This is the ultimate “hostess gift”.  If you have read some of my previous blog posts, you know I proselytize the “power of the pause”!!! I absolutely love it this idea and thought I’d pass it along to you.

Let me share a few more notes from our gathering.   We agreed that kindness never gets old.  We discussed the importance of a “friendship network” and how confidence is the sexiest quality in a person.

Remember the phrase, “Be careful what you wish for!”  I am a firm believer that the intentions you put out to the Universe will be answered but I was advised that the intentions I speak of may not be specific enough.  Holy smokes, thank you.  As a result, I made an appointment with the Universe today and restated my intentions in very specific terms!  Phew.

I am reminded of a story where a blind man was granted one wish.  You would imagine he would ask for his sight but his wish was as follows and I paraphrase, “I wish to be standing on the roof of my mansion, covered in gold, watching my many grandchildren play in the vast garden.”    Was he greedy?  Maybe but the moral of the story is to ask for exactly what you want.  Just sayin!

Today I felt a renewed sense of creativity.  Was it the result of the gathering?  YES!  The people you surround yourself with can lift you up or drain you.  Be selective with your time.

You are your most valuable resource.

Thank you, ladies!

From the heart,


Photo credit:

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