TGIF = Thank Goodness I’m Fabulousadvice & strategies choices communication courageous dialogue emotions & emotional inventory grudge honesty integrity relationships & communication self-esteem twa
On Friday’s, I volunteer with a day care program designed for people with early stage Alzheimer’s. I have the good fortune of selecting material for a reading and discussion hour. Today we talked about how a mother wished she had more patience and was never angry with her children but Mister Fred Rogers, educator and TV host, advised that the best thing we can do for our children is to express a wide range of emotions, including anger (just appropriately!) so that our children learn healthy habits.
I asked the class, “What is something important you wish to teach or talk to a child about?” The list was long but the answers that registered most with me were happiness, the power of prayer, compassion and the importance of helping others. I couldn’t agree more, adding my two cents, perfectionism is overrated.
I also mentioned that at my office we have something called COURAGEOUS DIALOGUE, a major factor that attracted me the company. If you have an issue with someone at work, regardless of their position, you ask for a Courageous Dialogue (CD) where you come together to work things out. Each person has the opportunity to hear the other one out, one on one, without judgment and under confidentiality. I have used the process and there is nothing more refreshing than hashing out a miscommunication before it festers into a larger problem.
My personal life isn’t always so tidy. Today I got an email that angered me to such a degree that I was speechless. If I were a cartoon character, you would have seen steam blasting out of my ears, my eyes the size of saucers and my hands accusingly placed on my hips. In real life, the surge of blood pressure caused a bloody nose, nature’s way of getting me to sit down and breathe, so I couldn’t get in the car and go confront the offender.
I can’t remember the last time I felt such disgust and rage. That part doesn’t really worry me – after all I’m only human. The real danger was that I started to doubt myself. When the anger left my body, it took along my self-esteem for company.
I phoned a friend. I took the high road and didn’t respond. I’ve learned that “TWA” or “typing/texting while angry” leads to bigger trouble so I shut off the computer, washed my face and cuddled with my doggie. I have a very good support system!
This is what gets me. I am perplexed by people who don’t have the integrity or maybe it is the courage to communicate honestly. These people, no I’ll call them gutless eunuchs, hide behind insulting emails, gossip and lies. These adults really disappoint me.
Listen, just do me a favor and stop playing this stupid game. We don’t have to be friends.
I’ll do you a favor. I won’t spend time with you so you won’t be reminded of how insanely shallow and insecure you are. I will go even further not to tell you what I think of you and your issues because I am not cruel nor is it my place.
You can be sure of this. I won’t be giving you the satisfaction of a response to your provocation because you are not worth the time and energy. You expected a vitriolic assault but HA HA, there is far more power in my silence.
My self-esteem is back. And it brought with it my ability to hold a grudge. This grudge is going to propel me forward to prove that you are not going to get in the way of my happiness and my success. You need to grow up, grow a pair and get the hell out of my way.
Finally, thank you for the opportunity to remind myself just how absolutely amazing I am!
TGIF = Thank Goodness I’m Fabulous. I never needed you but it took until now to realize it. You just keep living in the damp greyness other there and I’ll stay in the luscious light over here. Now you’ll be living in my shadow and I’m starting to feel sorry for you. Well, just a little bit.
From the heart,
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how will people remember you? humor i am i am a human washing machine i am a work of art. i don't care what you think i eve everything you think i see you i will be heard. i will be seen. if you're happy and you know it thank your ex inclusion inner critic inner mentor inner voice integrity invite happiness to linger isolation it takes courage to be you it's a good thing i like you it's ok to cry judgment kaleidoscope karen schlaegel kindness labor of love laugh at yourself laughter learning from the past leave your comfort zone leaving your comfort zone lessie miller letting go letting go of expectations letting go of the past letting the past go life after divorce life is short light up the room limit your negative thinking living authentically living in the moment living in yesterday living on contingency lmao looking back to where i began looking forward to my future lortnoc loss of a parent love love me outloud love mom love yourself-no great gift low self-esteem manage your inner critic manifesting manifesto men mental fitness mental wellness middleaged bodies mind maintenance mindfulness practice mindset matters modeling good behavior moms and daughters monkey mind more than a pretty face mothers mother’s and daughters mother’s day move it! moving on after divorce mr. rogers my girlfriend voice my letting go ceremony my own worst critic my tank ran dry mystical machu picchu need for control need to vent negative thinking new beginnings new orleans new year new you no blame games no regrets not good enough nothing more badass than loving who you are numbing older and wiser on-line dating opiodcrisis opposites attract our new normal outsourcing discomfort overachiever overwelmed parenting parents patience pause pause and prioritize pausing for poise perfectionism perfectly imperfect badass periscope personal power personal responsibility personal sanctuary planting the seeds of hope pleasure principle plug into your power positive memory recall positive thinking post-divorce gratitude power play pp moment pray for peace prioritize your time procrastination psychology today putting fear aside quiet mind quiet time racial justice racism raising children ready to recieve recalibration recall recycle redefining the future reduce regrets relationships relationships & communication relaxation relaxation technique remove the stigma renovators & rescuers repurposing resentment resolutions respecting differences respond rather than react reuse sadness sadness is a verb salsa dancing same wavelength saving money saying goodbye scam second hand stress self-acceptance self-care self-esteem self-expression self-loathing #mygirlfriendvoice self-support system self-talk selfcare sense of humor setting intentions shame shedding limitations shelter in place simplify sisters of another mother sitting with discomfort smother and hover social obligations solo travel soul sisters of solace speak your truth spelling bee stay at home order stigma stop complaining stop the nonsense stop the stigma stress stress busters stress management stressfree struggling struggling accelerates growth subscribe substanceusedisorder sud super hero powers support surrender taboo take my advice talk back to negativity tall poppy syndrome texting while angry the 5 c's the conscous kid the fear factor the four agreements the happy truck the inner critic the office party the single life the soul the voices in my head theemotionalrollercoaster think positive this too shall pass thoughts matter three gifts to share with friends and strangers time for change too many parties too little time toxic thinking treat yourself triggers & the inner critic trust turning 50 turning shit into sunshine twa unemployed unplug unsolicted advice use your voice v is for vulnerability valerie frankel visualization volunteer vulnerability warrior woman ; responding from a place of power website launch wellness what you feed gets stronger what's the worst thing that can happen? 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